Reality Bites – A Quintessential Truth #24
When we lay down the truth to someone nine times out of ten they will become offended and defensive at the same time.
Face it, some people just can’t handle the truth, nor do they want to hear it.
The answer is simple, if they have to face the ugly truth they also have to accept some blame in a situation of life as well as face-the-fact that others have been hurt by the life choices they’ve made. And, you all well know that these situations come around when someone has made some incredibly bad choices in their lives and now it’s time to find their way back to reality and face the piper as it were.
Survival of the fittest right?
So, if that’s the case then the strong must support the weak, just a fact. But at the same time, if the weak have purposefully put themselves in a path of destruction and despair some realities need to be brought out front and confronted head on. Otherwise they will never see the errors of their ways.
I’ve pointed out a few things in previous installments. One of them being that some souls can be some-what self-centered, meaning, everything has to be about them and what they want and on their terms. But the reality is there are those of us out there that were put in their path to help stop their self-destruction by pointing out the obvious and sometimes we have to be the bad guys when it comes to pointing things out. Case in point, during one of these types of conversations person one may let person two know how imperfect their own life is and that person two is not the only one facing life’s difficulties. Here-in lies the issue of the selfish and self-centered, they WILL immediately take offense if you happen to point out to someone that they are being a, are you ready for it, a “DRAMA QUEEN”, (and for all intense purposes our definition of drama queen here is someone who is over-the-top, all boo-hoo me, feel sorry for me, omg life is horrible what will I ever do, kind of person but they will tell you and everyone else that they loathe drama of any kind. REALLY???!!! Well Fuck-sake! Big Surprise……Not!) and forget what person one said to them about their own life-traumas in a millisecond. You see, the “drama queen” type will always redirect the conversation back to themselves, it is an absolute fact people, this ain’t no joke.
It’s all because:
- They don’t know how to deal with the situation.
- If the focus is not on them then they must face reality and reality is something they’ve tried to avoid by every means possible. They’ve become accustomed to living in their own little fantasy land.
- Facing the reality you are pointing out to them means admitting to their own shame and guilt. They’ve been outted, they can’t hide any more, the gig is up and they realize they have gone to far, pushed you to your brink and realized you are very close to walking out of their lives for good. Humans can only take so much before their breaking point hits. Reach this plateau and you are on thin ice my friend.
There are warning signs, you just need to know your limits and theirs and go ahead with the reality lesson. You know you’ve struck a raw nerve if they get defensive right away. They will also become argumentative and will try to avoid you afterwards because they know you will deliver a hard dose of truth and are not afraid to call bullshit on them.
You warn them by saying “STOP” this behavior and they come back at you a day or two later, sometimes longer for some, and either ask for forgiveness , another chance or for you to keep believing in them and for you not to give up on them or give up hope. Then they will avoid you again. It’s a tactic to keep you there so don’t be afraid to speak your mind. They have a right to know what they’ve done with the choices they’ve made. They have a right to know they’ve hurt themselves and others and that if the behavior continues they’ll end up alone because they will have alienated everyone with their actions.
I have had to lay down some pretty hard truths this last year and because of that have had people yell at me and call me names and also go round telling others they hate me because they were forced to face their own realities. So what, I’m grown and I can certainly handle it. It may have saved a life, forced someone to get sober and pushed someone to face their addictions and realize there is more to life and that life is worth living. If you can’t stay truthful you become fake and no-one wants to deal with a fake person because they can never be trusted. Remain truthful and you will always be remembered. You will be the one standing tall because you will never have to keep track of what you’ve said and to whom. The truth will always set you free and free is where we all want to be.
In some cases we have to be a bit harsh and blunt to get through to the stubborn but do you know what?
If they truly love and respect you they’ll seriously sit and think about what you’ve said to them. Especially if you’ve hit that raw nerve. If they become combative well, you know what they say, ‘The Truth Hurts’ and it hurts because it’s real and when it’s real the heart and soul ache.
You can’t expect everyone in the world to treat you with kit-gloves, especially when you know for a fact you are in the wrong.
Stop trying to mask the wrongs and learn to accept the truth, even if it hurts. Pain both physical and emotional lets you know that you, my dear friend, are still very much alive.
Accept what is….
Learn from it….
Correct what is wrong….
Keep moving on….
Until next time my loves.
This is your last Quintessential Truth for 2015.
SEE YOU ALL NEXT YEAR!
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